Death is never easy to accept or cope with, even for someone such as Saint Augustine. In Confessions Augustine makes a complete spiritual transformation throughout the course of a few chapters as seen by diction, word choice and phrasing. First seen as a grief stricken, tormented individual, he evolves into being in control of his emotions later after his mothers passing.
In Book IV, Augustine is crushed by the death of his dear friend. With phrasing such as” I wept bitter tears and found my only consolation in their very bitterness” his raw emotion is clearly seen (77). His thoughts are suddenly consumed with death as he struggles to come to terms with the concept that everything material must come to an end (78). By using diction such as “grim” “torment” “heartbroken” “grieved” and “bitter” his emotional state is clear (76). The key to this pain in his life at this time is found on page 78 where he directly tells God “ I knew, Lord, that I ought to offer it up to you, for you would heal it. But this I would not do, nor could I, especially as I did not think of you as anything real and substantial” (78). It was at this point before he converted that he describes his soul as half missing (78). However as his writing is done in a reflective style, his first sign of a spiritual transformation is seen on page 79 when he directly tells God “They alone will never lose those who are dear to them, for they love them in one who is never lost…” (79). Looking back on this time in his life it is clear that God is absent from his heart when contrasted with his reaction to the death of his mother.
Later, in Book IX Augustine is forced to face the harsh reality of his beloved mother’s death. This time however one can tell that a spiritual turn around has taken place in his life. By using wording such as “holy life” “faith” “tender feelings” and “sorrow” Augustine is still experiencing pain, but now is able to take his sorrow to the Lord rather than holding it all to himself as seen in Book IV. While a great pain was still felt for Monica’s death, he claims her soul was set free from her body and she was going to be with God now (200). Augustine did not feel the need to physically cry except to God because he now knew that God was a God of compassion, rather than an unsubstantial concept. Such a remarkable contrast is seen when he says “ did not think it right to mark my mother’s death with weeping…such lamentations are the usual accompaniment of death when it is thought of as...total extinction” (200). Although his mother is physically gone from this earth, he realizes that mourning and weeping for her is foolish because she is with God, unlike his realization that everything dies with his friends passing.
The change in Augustine between Book IV and Book IX is most evident through the events and emotions surrounding first the death of a dear friend, and then later the death of his mother. His conversion to Christianity is key, and is apparent in the words and phrases he chooses to account for his emotions.
Bibliography: Saint Augustine. Confessions. Editied by R. S. Pine-Coffin. London, England: Penguin Group, 1961.
This is a great blog post! I like how you commented on his spiritual change. I think it’s interesting to see how he coped with exactly what we do today. I also find it interesting how you point out that when Augustine’s friend died, he knew that he needed to offer his life to God to receive healing, but does not do so. I wonder why that is? I’m impressed with Augustine’s maturity with the death of his mother. I know I couldn’t view death that way right now. You wrote a great post with interesting points!
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